The days blend together forming one endless gray blur with subtle fluctuations of washed-out hues of what could resemble colors. I’ve lost something of myself in these days. I don’t feel the same – strong, intelligent, or courageous. I can’t fall asleep at night simply because I don’t know how I’m going to get back what I’ve lost. The things I once enjoyed, but never seemed to have the time to focus on are still here in front of me. And I have what seems to be all the time in the world and yet, they still are untouched.
I cannot change what has happened in the past, I cannot linger on my failures and roadblocks. It’s destroying my present and potentially my future. I never thought I’d be where I am today, but I made a promise to change. To fight with whatever it is I have left. I made a promise.