Day 60: Black Spot


Day 60. February 29, 2012

Feeling particularly girly this evening, I indulged not in watching my usual category of documentaries on Netflix, but some good old “Say Yes to the Dress”. One particular episode happened to be about grandmother’s and their standards of wedding gowns being both modest and traditional. It was entertaining to watch their expressions as the granddaughters appeared in gown after gown waiting to hear the approval of grandma.

While I know my grandmother wouldn’t stand for anything too glitzy or overly revealing, I do know she would enjoy herself. To be a part of helping me pick out a dress similar to hers, sharing stories of what her wedding was like, the details of the event. It is still difficult to grasp that she won’t be a part of it. That neither of my grandmas will. There are countless films, photos, and ads surrounding a central idea in which women of the family come together to celebrate & encourage the bride. And while I have more aunts and cousins than I know what to do with, I shall miss the intimate connection of my grandmothers.

The show pulled at my heartstrings, upon my selfish desire to never let go of those I’ve lost. A black spot on a memory that will not exist for many years.


Day 59: Ready, Set, Wait


Day 59. February 28, 2012

Finished my Easter outfit today, I did. Excited is not nearly a strong enough adjective to describe how I feel about getting all dressed up for the holiday.

Easter is my Christmas. It is my favorite holiday, beyond any other. Most people would ask, “what about your birthday?” and to that I laugh in their face and inform them that my birthday is at the bottom of the list, above Halloween of course. Easter is my favorite simply because it is not in any, way, shape or form about me. In my family it has never been about receiving presents, sure a small Easter basket, but that was never the focus. Easter is a day for celebration, praise, and of course – deviled eggs.

Unfortunately for me its is more than a whole month away…

So I sit here shivering in my cold, damp apartment dreaming of Easter & warm weather. Maybe by April the temperature will rise a wee bit and release me from my permanent state of numb limbs.

Day 58: The Dinosaur Outside


Day 58. February 27, 2012

There’s a new complex of apartments/townhouses/too-expensive-for-my-budget living quarters being built right next door to my apartment, just like there is on every other block in Eugene. Construction noises and rumbles are nothing new. But this morning when I reached to get my container of granola out of the cupboard I noticed that the construction was not coming from the east, but from the south – right outside the kitchen window. Pull back the curtain and bam – the strange, vacant blue building that stared at us through the window was now half torn apart. A surprise to say the least. What they’re going to do with the lot now, who knows. But it had better be a parking lot.

Day 57: Upside Down


Day 57. February 26, 2012

Have you ever looked at or experienced something for so long that it becomes forgotten, overlooked, nothing more than a blur in the background of life? That painting you were so excited to frame and hang – now two months later you wouldn’t notice if it suddenly fell from the wall. But then one day that same item/idea/thought process is seen in a whole new light. From a different angle or even uncovered from the rest of the clutter in life.

I believe that happens to each of us. We go through the same motions for too long that things lose the value they once held in the beginning. Take a step back, approach the same daily tasks in a different way, rekindle an old passion that you’ve let slip under the radar.

Day 56: The Perfect Amount


Day 56. February 25, 2012

Washing dishes is a relaxing task for me. Really, cleaning in general is relaxing. It reduces stress, while boosting positive morale in knowing that my surroundings are becoming tidy. I don’t need things to be neat & tidy all the time, sometimes I even purposefully neglect to put clothes away in my room just so that a few days later I can tidy up my room and feel better.

It’s pretty difficult to be an art student and keep a clean work space, I count myself lucky not to be compelled by the need for order. Though I could argue that I have order in chaos. Sure, you may look at my make-shift desk and see nothing but piles of papers, boxes, and containers but each has their own specific purpose. That’s why I like containers so much, because they literally contain my random trinkets and art supplies. If it weren’t for shoe boxes, I’d have piles of paints, watercolor papers, paintbrushes, etc. all over. Boxes are uniform, easily accessed, and most importantly – they have lids. Continue reading

Day 55: Hello, Bangs


Day 55. February 24, 2012

My bangs have always been a source of joy, but also a great amount of turmoil. I love the way the look…when the are styled correctly. But in the past my bangs have hardly ever done what I want them to & I just end up sweeping them off my face, thus leaving them worthless.

They had grown out so long in these past few months, I couldn’t take it any longer. So. I pulled out my scissors and went to town. They turned out a bit shorter than I’d like, but overall I’m pretty pleased. It’s been a long time since I’ve had noticeable side bangs and it brings a whole new look.

When it gets to be the end of winter, almost spring I tend to get anxious. The weather tends to tease with one or two sunny days, and my mind starts to hope for better days. So I trick myself into thinking the winter cold will soon be over by gradually dipping my toes in my spring wardrobe. And making other changes – like cutting my hair.

It all comes down to psychology, doesn’t it? If we let ourselves believe spring is just around the bend, then our emotional state may also be lifted. A lifted spirit can make any amount of waiting bearable.

Day 54: Treasures


Day 54. February 23, 2012

My newest sewing endeavor, creating my Easter outfit, began today with the skirt. I transformed an old curtain panel into a beautiful box-pleated skirt with a soft cotton floral lining. I still have no zippers, so I tend to think out-of-the-box when it comes to closures. Luckily, I found a hook-eye closure in my jar of buttons which I shall use for the skirt while embellishing the waistband with a statement button.

I found the perfect beauty among my small collection of buttons, while taking a trip down memory lane. A great deal of my buttons were given to me by my grandmother when I first got into sewing. During the last year before her and my grandfather moved she began to sort her surplus of crafting supplies & she turned to me first before donating anything. Continue reading